Are you a virgin?

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Are you a virgin?

Yes
134
61%
No
87
39%
 
Total votes : 221

Re: Are you a virgin?

Unread postby WeiWenDi » Sun Dec 15, 2013 1:34 pm

I've had an experience recently which makes me want to revise my earlier position in a drastic, drastic way. Well, maybe not revise, but rather append. I originally said that keeping one's virginity until marriage is not necessary to be a good person, and I still believe that. But man, does one avoid a hell of a lot of pain if they don't do what I did. My V-card came back to bite me in the arse, so to speak.

Basically, we went through a really messy break-up that involved her getting into a long-distance one-sided spitting match with my parents, and I just lost all respect for her after that. She kept pestering my mother with abusive phone calls after we broke up, and kept sending me e-mails in much the same tone. And then recently she came to my workplace to basically try to convince me to leave my wife and daughter and come back to her, and threatened me with God's punishment if I didn't. And now she's back to sending me abusive e-mails, and she's convinced that she has rights over me because she took my virginity.

Given the huge mistake I made there, I'm seriously considering taking the tack that it's really best to leave off sex for marriage, and make sure that each partner has a solid relationship with the people that are most important in your life, and not just you - not to mention similar attitudes, similar interests, similar personality and similar perspectives on life and the world. I'm not interested in 'purity' that much unless by 'purity' you mean purity of heart and clarity of intentions. But sex just isn't the most important thing in life, and the people who seem to think it is are, in my experience, also some of the most despairing and miserable.

Anyway, just my random thoughts on the topic now. Based on my entirely anecdotal experience, of course, so feel free to ignore it.
Some more blood, Chekov. The needle won't hurt, Chekov. Take off your shirt, Chekov. Roll over, Chekov. Breathe deeply, Chekov. Blood sample, Chekov! Marrow sample, Chekov! Skin sample, Chekov! If I live long enough... I'm going to run out of samples.
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WeiWenDi
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Re: Are you a virgin?

Unread postby Shikanosuke » Sun Dec 15, 2013 2:46 pm

WeiWenDi wrote:I've had an experience recently which makes me want to revise my earlier position in a drastic, drastic way. Well, maybe not revise, but rather append. I originally said that keeping one's virginity until marriage is not necessary to be a good person, and I still believe that. But man, does one avoid a hell of a lot of pain if they don't do what I did. My V-card came back to bite me in the arse, so to speak.

Basically, we went through a really messy break-up that involved her getting into a long-distance one-sided spitting match with my parents, and I just lost all respect for her after that. She kept pestering my mother with abusive phone calls after we broke up, and kept sending me e-mails in much the same tone. And then recently she came to my workplace to basically try to convince me to leave my wife and daughter and come back to her, and threatened me with God's punishment if I didn't. And now she's back to sending me abusive e-mails, and she's convinced that she has rights over me because she took my virginity.

Given the huge mistake I made there, I'm seriously considering taking the tack that it's really best to leave off sex for marriage, and make sure that each partner has a solid relationship with the people that are most important in your life, and not just you - not to mention similar attitudes, similar interests, similar personality and similar perspectives on life and the world. I'm not interested in 'purity' that much unless by 'purity' you mean purity of heart and clarity of intentions. But sex just isn't the most important thing in life, and the people who seem to think it is are, in my experience, also some of the most despairing and miserable.

Anyway, just my random thoughts on the topic now. Based on my entirely anecdotal experience, of course, so feel free to ignore it.



I'm wagering that's not a side-effect of sex before marriage, but the product of an insane/unhealthy female/individual. My sympathies!

EDIT: Also, had no idea you had children. If thats new, congratulations!
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Shikanosuke
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Re: Are you a virgin?

Unread postby WeiWenDi » Sun Dec 15, 2013 3:30 pm

Shikanosuke wrote:I'm wagering that's not a side-effect of sex before marriage, but the product of an insane/unhealthy female/individual. My sympathies!

EDIT: Also, had no idea you had children. If thats new, congratulations!


Many thanks, Shik - on both counts! Yeah, my ex wasn't exactly what we'd call the most stable of people, and unfortunately it took her treatment of my mother for me to really realise that. There were signs even before then, though...

Yep, little WeiWenGongZhu is about 16 months old now, able to say 'baba', 'mama' and 'bye-bye', and able to walk on her own (but only just!). We're a little concerned about her calcium intake since she still only has six teeth. But overall she's doing pretty well!
Some more blood, Chekov. The needle won't hurt, Chekov. Take off your shirt, Chekov. Roll over, Chekov. Breathe deeply, Chekov. Blood sample, Chekov! Marrow sample, Chekov! Skin sample, Chekov! If I live long enough... I'm going to run out of samples.
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WeiWenDi
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Re: Are you a virgin?

Unread postby Boydie » Mon Dec 16, 2013 2:29 pm

WeiWenDi wrote:I've had an experience recently which makes me want to revise my earlier position in a drastic, drastic way. Well, maybe not revise, but rather append. I originally said that keeping one's virginity until marriage is not necessary to be a good person, and I still believe that. But man, does one avoid a hell of a lot of pain if they don't do what I did. My V-card came back to bite me in the arse, so to speak.

Basically, we went through a really messy break-up that involved her getting into a long-distance one-sided spitting match with my parents, and I just lost all respect for her after that. She kept pestering my mother with abusive phone calls after we broke up, and kept sending me e-mails in much the same tone. And then recently she came to my workplace to basically try to convince me to leave my wife and daughter and come back to her, and threatened me with God's punishment if I didn't. And now she's back to sending me abusive e-mails, and she's convinced that she has rights over me because she took my virginity.

Given the huge mistake I made there, I'm seriously considering taking the tack that it's really best to leave off sex for marriage, and make sure that each partner has a solid relationship with the people that are most important in your life, and not just you - not to mention similar attitudes, similar interests, similar personality and similar perspectives on life and the world. I'm not interested in 'purity' that much unless by 'purity' you mean purity of heart and clarity of intentions. But sex just isn't the most important thing in life, and the people who seem to think it is are, in my experience, also some of the most despairing and miserable.

Anyway, just my random thoughts on the topic now. Based on my entirely anecdotal experience, of course, so feel free to ignore it.


Wow! That's nuts! She played the religious card. Hope nothing like that happens to me in the future.
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Boydie
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