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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you.

Unread postby Mikhail » Sat Mar 24, 2012 4:59 am

Anyone have any suggestions for breaking an addiction?

It's an addiction that isn't terrible or unhealthy in any sort of way but I'm being forced out of it in a sense because the addiction itself is dependent on another and that other is refusing to continue. And no, it's also not anything physical.
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you.

Unread postby SunXia » Sat Mar 24, 2012 5:40 am

There are various forms, cold turkey, gradually releasing yourself etc!!

Get hobbies, things new to you, that you haven't done before, distract yourself, eliminate the obsession from your life so that over time you will be reminded off it less and less!! Try not to do things that you would have done during that obsession because you will remind yourself of them!! Later, it'll hurt less!!

Of course there is always counselling!!
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you.

Unread postby Aygor » Sun Apr 01, 2012 5:37 pm

If it is not a serious addiction about your health, i think cutting totally and swiftly any contact with it would be fine. You'll hate it for a couple if weeks, then you'll just get used to it and start doing something better. that's kinda what i did with Fb and many other pointless addicting things
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you.

Unread postby Pi Ka Chu » Mon Jul 09, 2012 8:34 pm

Is it better to take a class for the GRE or is it better to study on your own for it?
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you

Unread postby chinesecannibal » Wed Oct 03, 2012 12:45 am

I am half Viet, half Chinese and most of my family are made up of halfers, too; and lately, there's been a lot of stories about cannibalism (what with bathsalts and all...). To add to my disgust, my mom also told me that people in China are still butchering each other up to sell as meat. Then she said that Chinese people are cruel, they have such a powerful and rich country as is yet they still commit these acts. And just last week, my uncle told me not to eat the dumplings when we were at a Chinese restaurant. Now I have a new role model - Cheng Yu - but then I found out he was a cannibal. I also remember how some of my closest Chinese friends and my great-aunt always talked about making profit and never thinking about others' detriment. And it just makes me think that Chinese people are greedy and selfish. I see it in myself sometimes, too, but I'm doing my best to fight it. When people ask me what I am, I'm ashamed to say I'm Chinese so I tell them I'm Viet.

How do I deal with this?
Are you guys Chinese, too?
Where did this general behavior come from? Was it a cause of the Warring States?

UPDATE - Thank you, Tian Shan and Lady Wu. Now I don't feel like cannibalizing people if America collapses.
Last edited by chinesecannibal on Tue Oct 09, 2012 12:23 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you

Unread postby Tian Shan » Thu Oct 04, 2012 7:47 pm

Mikhail wrote:Anyone have any suggestions for breaking an addiction?

It's an addiction that isn't terrible or unhealthy in any sort of way but I'm being forced out of it in a sense because the addiction itself is dependent on another and that other is refusing to continue. And no, it's also not anything physical.


Well first you can start with the psychological approach.
Any sort of addiction/dependence is not healthy at least mentally.
Anything in excess or obsessive is not healthy right?
-You should analyze this addiction with the mind, why you like it, what do you honestly gain from it? Do you really want this addiction/to be this kind of person? What are the consequences of this action? Are you just doing this to satisfy some desire? Where does that desire lead to? And especially where does it come from?
How can I avoid this desire? How can I fight against it? How can I better spend my time to become a stronger and better person? What kind of person do I really want to be?
Is this desire linked/caused by something else, some other problem? How can you solve those problem?
-Analyze often, whenever you are tempted, and then reflect on the answers. Meditate on them. The mind can always find justifications and excuses, so after mental analysis try to understand with your heart.
-Find the strength to resist temptation. For example use your energy more constructively like exercising, studying, relaxing, Helping others. Read things that are anti-vice and inspirational. If you are religious or somewhat religious try praying for strength. Talk to someone who can help you overcome it. Learn more discipline/self-control like taking a martial arts, yoga, breathing exercises, ect…

Let me know if this helps or you want more.
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you

Unread postby Tian Shan » Thu Oct 04, 2012 8:22 pm

chinesecannibal wrote:I am half Viet, half Chinese and most of my family are made up of halfers, too; and lately, there's been a lot of stories about cannibalism (what with bathsalts and all...). To add to my disgust, my mom also told me that people in China are still butchering each other up to sell as meat. Then she said that Chinese people are cruel, they have such a powerful and rich country as is yet they still commit these acts. And just last week, my uncle told me not to eat the dumplings when we were at a Chinese restaurant. Now I have a new role model - Cheng Yu - but then I found out he was a cannibal. I also remember how some of my closest Chinese friends and my great-aunt always talked about making profit and never thinking about others' detriment. And it just makes me think that Chinese people are greedy and selfish. I see it in myself sometimes, too, but I'm doing my best to fight it. When people ask me what I am, I'm ashamed to say I'm Chinese so I tell them I'm Viet.

How do I deal with this?
Are you guys Chinese, too?
Where did this general behavior come from? Was it a cause of the Warring States?


Well actually every culture/country throughout history and even today do some pretty bad things.
I know in Asian cultures there is more a concept of ancestral shame, but As long as you do not promote or contribute to cannibalism, you should have no shame for it. But if you really feel shame/guilt for it, take some actions/speak out against it. I respect that you try to fight it.
My other Chinese friends are proud to have their heritage but often say they can’t stand other Chinese people because they just try to take advantage of you, ect…But that only served to motivate us to not be like that and to ensure others were not aswell.
When I was younger I used to be ashamed of the human race for all its atrocities to each other and the planet. But I firmly believe in what the Great Learning says.
The Great Learning by Confucius – which you should read essentially says
http://classics.mit.edu/Confucius/learning.html
“All that takes for evil to succeed is for good people to sit back and do nothing”
“Be the change you want to see in the world”
Nationalism weather through pride or inverted pride = shame is still a form of discrimination and sectarianism.
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"Peace be with you."
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you

Unread postby Lady Wu » Fri Oct 05, 2012 5:22 am

chinesecannibal wrote:I am half Viet, half Chinese and most of my family are made up of halfers, too; and lately, there's been a lot of stories about cannibalism (what with bathsalts and all...). To add to my disgust, my mom also told me that people in China are still butchering each other up to sell as meat. Then she said that Chinese people are cruel, they have such a powerful and rich country as is yet they still commit these acts. And just last week, my uncle told me not to eat the dumplings when we were at a Chinese restaurant. Now I have a new role model - Cheng Yu - but then I found out he was a cannibal. I also remember how some of my closest Chinese friends and my great-aunt always talked about making profit and never thinking about others' detriment. And it just makes me think that Chinese people are greedy and selfish. I see it in myself sometimes, too, but I'm doing my best to fight it. When people ask me what I am, I'm ashamed to say I'm Chinese so I tell them I'm Viet.

How do I deal with this?
Are you guys Chinese, too?
Where did this general behavior come from? Was it a cause of the Warring States?

First, cannibalism has never been condoned by Chinese culture. However, China is a populous country that has gone through some really tough times through the ages, and in that kind of desperation anyone from any background might do anything.

Second, because of all the turmoil that China has been through, many people learned to look out for themselves and their families first and foremost, even if it's at the expense of other people. This is by no means a traditional Chinese value either.

Like Tian Shan said, you are not responsible for bad things that your ancestors or fellow Chinese people have done. Rather, look to the positive aspects of the Chinese heritage and strive to show others what your heritage is really about. For me, being a Chinese means being hardworking, loving to learn and to improve myself, doing everything in moderation, being reflective about why I do what I do, and taking responsibility for my family. So this is what I try to be in my daily life, instead of living in shame for all those things that I am not and did not do.

But next time if someone asks you what you "are", tell them "a human being". ;)
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you

Unread postby mrbeate » Wed Sep 18, 2013 12:46 am

Well, MrBeate is back with more issues. I just graduated from highschool but I'm taking an alternative program to get my math and chemistry credits so I can get into my college program. I'm staying back a year. My parents you see will not pay for my college tuition being the ignorant( and wealthy ) people they are, will only support me financially if I go to university. I also want to move out and go to Niagara College for Electrical Engineering. I'm the younger brother to a business all achieving perfect older brother.

I have about 8 months to work full time this year to help play for my fees and applying to OSAP for loans but I'm unsure how much money they're giving me.

What I'm asking is just for suggestions, and advice on how to handle this or what I can do about it. Am I able pay for all this? Living, food, books, tuition. Are there other financial assistance programs that can help?
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Re: Problems? Need help or support? Let us offer it to you

Unread postby Zhuanyong » Wed Sep 18, 2013 1:33 am

mrbeate wrote:My parents you see will not pay for my college tuition being the ignorant( and wealthy ) people they are, will only support me financially if I go to university.


:shock: The fact that they would be willing to foot any portion of the bill is a gesture well taken from my point-of-view. Some "wealthy" parents make their children earn everything they get regardless of where they go to school...

What I'm asking is just for suggestions, and advice on how to handle this or what I can do about it. Am I able pay for all this? Living, food, books, tuition. Are there other financial assistance programs that can help?


Did you check for any Pell grant options? Loans are additional options but you may want to stay clear of them as much as possible. I'm not sure if that is available there but, it is an option if available. I would also check Scholarships.com to see if there are any scholarships (and there usually are, though you may have to write an essay or two) that you qualify for.
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