Girlfriend

[SunXia]

Oh offering is fine!! I also advised Mik on chat that if she does offer to pay and seems enthusiastic, AKA wants to then ask "Are you sure??" as it looks like he cares!! However, I dislike it when people insist they must spoil me!! Me and a guy broke up a week after he bought me a PSP for nothing, for nothing!! I'm sorry I can't spoilt like that, it makes me awkward!!

[clashofwisdom45]

^ excuse me for saying this, but you're some weird girl for that. makes you kinda my treat.

ok, enough with my online swag. lol.
If the lady wants to pay for stuff, buy her own stuff, then let her. but occasionally of course, try to sneak in a couple of jabs on the "giving" table, and make her get some from you for a change. its right that someone in the thread said it's like "my turn, your turn", plus it makes a great activity for people, couples whatever.

[SunXia]

I'm a woman, I'm not a girl, haven't been for a long while!! And yes I know by today's standards I am odd, but I'm not materialistic and I prefer it that way!!

[Mikhail]

Is there any reason to believe the confessions of a drunk, distraught girl?

The first thing I got messaged to me on BBM this new year from the girl was "I love you" at around 12:04. She was drunk and she was crying because she got left alone by her friends in the train station, or got lost (no one seems to be clear on what happened) like maybe an hour before the new year and they only found her at around 12:30.

I ask her about it now when she's sober and awake and she tells me that she doesn't remember why she said it or that she said it at all. Is the fact that she cannot admit it while she's sober tell me that it was just that she was drunk and crying that made her say such randomness/falsity or is she just hiding her hand?

[TooMuchBaijiu]

I wouldn't put too much faith in that. She probably does care about you, but let's see...drunk, distraught, and on a holiday? She's pretty high up there on that emotional rollercoaster, I'd wager.

Question is, why didn't you try to pick her up? That'd be some Prince Charming shit right there, to save her from peril and all that.

[Mikhail]

I wouldn't put too much faith in that. She probably does care about you, but let's see...drunk, distraught, and on a holiday? She's pretty high up there on that emotional rollercoaster, I'd wager.

Question is, why didn't you try to pick her up? That'd be some Prince Charming shit right there, to save her from peril and all that.

She lives on the other side of town, TMB. I don't drive and it would take an hour via public transport to get to where she was, when public transport would be closing. Besides, I tried calling her and she kept hanging up on me.

But thats good. I thought it didn't mean much, but I just wanted to make sure. I mean, later on she did say that she didn't care if she mattered to me so it made sense.

[TooMuchBaijiu]

She lives on the other side of town, TMB. I don't drive and it would take an hour via public transport to get to where she was, when public transport would be closing. Besides, I tried calling her and she kept hanging up on me.

Well, there's been girls for whom I would literally call up a cab and roll all the way across town just to bring to "safety". But no, I'm not a hopeless (or brainless) romantic-I'm talking about like two very special people. Three. No, two. I didn't know if the girl in question was that kind of special, but then I read this...

But thats good. I thought it didn't mean much, but I just wanted to make sure. I mean, later on she did say that she didn't care if she mattered to me so it made sense.

...man, abandon ship, if you're not already rowing away in the lifeboat HMCS One-of-Her-Friends. I don't know about you, but if there's one thing I can't stand in a woman, it's that passive-aggressive mood swing BS.

[Mikhail]

That was during her emotional roller coaster period. So, if I'm supposed to take the "I love you" part with a grain of salt, shouldn't I take that part in the same vein? Or is that different?

[Zyzyfer]

Hmm, drunken antics can be a mixed bag. I've witnessed (and conducted) my fair share of dumb, emotional drunken rages. My friends tolerate it but do chide me the next day when it's particularly dumb. One ex was really bad about showing her jealousy from time to time when we went out drinking, and it certainly didn't help the relationship.

Frequency is the most important factor. A one-off on New Year's Eve after being dumped by friends doesn't mean squat. But if it happens more regularly, then yes, it is most definitely a red flag.

As for the meaning of it, my armchair DrunkSpeak analysis is thus: Drinking allows a person's hidden feelings to come to the surface as it removes some more basic inhibitions. Given what you described (saying she loves you, then saying it doesn't matter how you feel, not answering later calls) mainly seems to say that she's confused about how she feels about you.

I wouldn't put too much stock into it. In a way, it might even have been better if you had not mentioned any specific details later on. But that's just me.

[Pi Ka Chu]

Hmm, drunken antics can be a mixed bag. I've witnessed (and conducted) my fair share of dumb, emotional drunken rages. My friends tolerate it but do chide me the next day when it's particularly dumb. One ex was really bad about showing her jealousy from time to time when we went out drinking, and it certainly didn't help the relationship.

I've had my share of drunken antics. Most people usually ignore it but I manage to blow it (relationship wise) with the one guy that I liked because I was too drunk to noticed that he liked me too.