This one's a bit lewd so if you're faint of heart cover your screen.
A guy walks into a bar restroom. He hears someone at the urinal next to him and looks down to his side to see a dwarf standing next to him.
"Holy smokes," the man says, "I'm not gay or anything but I couldn't help notice you're surprisingly well equipped for a man of your stature."
"Ah, ye see but I'm no ordinary man," says the dwarf, "I'm a leprechaun, and if ye'd like I can grant ye a wish."
"If you don't mind I'd like to have a member like yours," the man says.
"OK fine," says the leprechaun, "but to do that Ay'll have tae use it on ye."
After much agonizing the man decides that the ends justify the means.
"So what do ye do?" asks the leprechaun.
"Rrrr, I'm a ... musician," the man says.
"An where ye from?" asks the leprechaun.
"Rrrr, New ... York," the man says.
"An how old are ye?" asks the leprechaun.
"Thirty ... seven," the man says.
"Ah," the leprechaun says, "tirty-seven years old and ye still believe in leprechauns."
"We can't mortgage our childrens' future on a mountain of debt," - Barack Obama